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| LEARN TO SAY NOTHING... |
Have you ever been in a meeting and the person who has the
most to say knows the least? Were you
ever evaluated by someone who is not in touch with what outside companies are
doing because they have only worked at this company for n-teenth years? Have you ever wondered how some people with
no work ethic and no experience get the higher paying jobs or at least the
title? Absolutely! It happens to most people who worked up the
ranks to get the expertise, received the education from the top universities,
and/or slaved tirelessly for 80+ hour work weeks to meet schedules and prove
their worth. But don’t blacklist yourself
by talking too much and worse, saying the wrong thing!
Here’s the art of biting your tongue, making a statement,
and keeping your allies:
- Appear aligned with superiors (e.g. supervisor, manager, etc.) and subordinates (e.g. employees, consultants, etc.) in front of others. There is nothing worse than the humiliating moment when a boss disagrees with a worker in front of others or vice versa when it could have been resolved before getting in front of a larger group. If you make your boss look good (of course, without compromising your integrity), you go a lot further. “Further” does not mean promotions but at least you will not be considered the enemy which can buy you time on making your next move. As the boss who stands behind your employees, the more dedicated they will be to you and harder they will work.
- Keep comments regarding others’ work experience or credentials confidential. The Oxford, Harvard, or Penn graduate received the opportunity (normally) because of college credentials and expertise. This does not mean they need to be pointed out to the rest of the group who has less credentials. It makes others feel inferior and can set the stage for “uncooperation” with both seasoned and unseasoned professionals. On the flip side, telling people that Joe is managing a group and has no experience managing nor completing the tasks he is asking his people to do does not work either. This causes friction and people lose enthusiasm to work for and with Joe. It further forces Joe to spark defense mechanisms that might not be healthy for the team.
- Bring a notebook or tablet to write thoughts privately during meetings. This will keep you out of trouble as long as you’re not sending messages to others in the meeting or making what you write visible like “he’s an idiot”, “this doesn’t make sense”, “can someone fire this moron”. When someone is saying something out of line and you can’t correct them calmly, start taking notes. If what is being said is not important, write out a task list on what it will take for you to complete your assignments for the day/week. If the time is right for you to move on, put together a plan with deadlines for a professional “i-am-out” plan to escape the madness. Keep the former or latter visible at all times in your notebook or tablet as a personal road map.
- Take the emotion out of the statements before disagreements. It is common to want to respond right away. But sending a text message or email to yourself or walking out the door for a smoke break or Starbucks Joy or Vanilla Robois tea is the best answer. What you send emotionally can result in devastating you financially. Take a deep breath and recognize there are bills to pay, mouths to feed, and lifestyles to preserve – all which matters more than backfire from making one wrong statement.
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